Mr. X.

You are the reason I draw stupid little hearts in my notebook...

Omergazam photography.

Dear Girls & Boys,

Please let me introduce to you this Tucson based photographer Omer Kreso aka Omergazam. I *heart* the way he sees the world through his lens. Check out his work, you won't be disappointed! There's fashion, street, rock 'n roll, friends, silly self portraits, family, pets, random ridiculousness, bathtubs & even some bathtub loving (he had me there! :)).

You might feel like a voyeur at times, but isn't soul - voyeurism the new black? ;)

Enjoy it!

xoxo

A Happy Thought A Day #4.

'A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.' 


So get to it girls & boys! :)

I can't help but wonder.

Mixtape for Mr X.

The other day I made a mixtape for, well, let's call him Mr X.

Songs that make me think of him with words that say what I'm not saying.

But I didn't give it to him...


...just yet ;).

In A Manner Of Speaking.

'So in a manner of speaking
I just want to say
That just like you I should find a way
To tell you everything
By saying nothing...'

This song by Nouvelle Vague is just so breathtaking....and a perfect soundtrack for a lazy Sunday afternoon like this one.

A Happy Thought a day #3.

Sunday Blues.

A Happy Thought A Day. #2

''If you really want something to happen, the whole universe conspires so that your wish comes true.'' 


A cliché? But of course! After all, it is a quote from 'The Alchemist' by Paulo Coelho, but oh boy, a happy thought it is! 

:)

You guys.

It strikes me every time I see that you guys are checking up on me from all over the world!

Please feel free to come here and share your sad, happy & random thoughts, after all this blog has been created because of my lack of communication with the rest of the world about certain 'issues'* ;).

I am sorry if I sound too depressed at times, but after all this is a place where I get to be THE Sad Eyed Lady Of The Lowlands if you catch my drift ;). See it this way, once I leave some of my thoughts here, I get to clear my head and be my happy self again!

Thanks guys.

Muchos love,

xoxo

* aka me trying to protect (the reputation of) that 'special' person.

Auch! My past keeps biting me in the ass. A-S-S. Ass. Ass. Yes, I said ass.

I know I keep repeating myself with 'Let Go', 'Let Go', 'Move On' & 'Let Go'. I think I mostly keep telling those things to myself though. Sometimes I manage to let go, but most of the time I just don't. And that sucks. Today I realized that I don't because I was confronted with something that I should have ignored, but I didn't. I stayed. I watched. I read. And here I am. Returning to my secret, safe haven where it is okay to feel 'this' way.

I hate the fact that I know him so well and still choose to misread the signs. He might say he is sorry, but he is not sorry, he is just happy that HE is doing better. I hate the fact that he does the things he does and that he still gets to me. I hate the fact that I am in a place where I should be happy and I still choose to be miserable because of the things he did and the same things that I accepted back then.

I hate the fact that I am still an open book to him and he chooses the lies, or the unsaid which might be even worse.

So every time I have to DJ I play a record for him, 'When the Sun Goes Down' by Arctic Monkeys. People dance to it without listening to the lyrics. It's a great tune, but also a very sad one. I bet that they wouldn't be dancing if they knew his story. The story that unfortunately got to be my story as well and that keeps haunting me. But I guess it's hard to care about that while enjoying a sunny Carribean beach huh? Well, I get that. So once again I get to be the one that gets it. Great.

Oh how I wish to wake up one day and forget that he was ever in my life.

Happy New Year.

Keep dreaming girls & boys!

xoxo